"Hey America, I'm Paris Hilton and I'm a celebrity too," Hilton declares breezily. "Only I'm not from the olden days and I'm not promising change like that other guy. I'm just hot.
"But then that wrinkly white-haired guy used me in his campaign ad, which I guess means I'm running for president. So thanks for the endorsement white-haired dude, and I want America to know I'm, like, totally ready to lead."
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